Cooking naked is disgusting

I know I certainly won't be doing it and I hope that you don't either

From the time we are little, we are told that our bodies are just ours and not for anyone else to see. Nudists defy this belief by going to resorts and flaunting their stuff at beaches, pools, gamerooms, and even restaurants.

Picture of woman wearing a taco costume
Picture of woman wearing a taco costume (photo via wondercosumes.com)

Not too long ago, I stumbled across an article from the New York Times about cooking naked. The thought of cooking naked really disturbed me, as there are just too many valuable things at risk of being splattered on. However, the overwhelming amount of butts next to a stove I saw on the page left me intrigued. 

I did some further digging to find out that nudists find a sense of relief when they don’t have clothes on, as they find clothing restrictive. Written in the article is a quote from a nudist that says, “The philosophy is, nude when possible, clothed when practical.” Although I respect that “naturalists” are doing what they want, I could never do this because it puts me in a place that is too vulnerable. 

Because clothing is supposedly “restrictive”, certain nudists believe that cooking without clothing allows for more imagination. The idea that someone can’t be creative with clothes on is a mystery to me. Clothing allows me to be comfortable, cozy, and clean, which makes it so much easier to be creative because I don’t have to worry about my body being in immediate danger from hot substances.

Not only do I not have to worry about burns and cuts on vital areas when I have clothes on, but I also can eat whatever I want without thinking twice about how spicy it is. Imagine: you’re cutting jalapeños for an extra little kick in some homemade salsa. Suddenly, you feel the urge to itch your thigh and you give in to the feeling. Think about what might happen…

How can someone eat food that they made while they were naked in their kitchen? It is unbelievably unsanitary. There should always be a barrier between the food you put into your mouth and your butt. Not having a barrier is disgusting and it taints food that could possibly taste very good.

So, next time you’re cooking, remember to throw on some clothes. It’s not that difficult and you probably won’t get the same injuries that you could get if you were nude.